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In a World Where Chimps Attack Stupid People, It's Nice to Know There are Bananas


Hello, you need some art in your life

when the new at & t runs the world

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Stupid Genius

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somehow, this is important

Zooey Vs. Scarlett Who Cares? Me, That's who?


amnesty, it's not just for breakfast anymore

Helping to Secure Human Rights for all



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February 17 2009

Chimp Attack 09' & the Octomom's Stunning resemblance to Angelina Jolie!! OMG!!!!

(From PrivacyCouncil.Org) Monday, a woman in Stamford, CT, was attacked and mauled by a pet chimpanzee. Travis the chimp, which belonged to Sandra Herold and which had appeared in TV commercials, was shot and killed during his violent rampage, and the woman he attacked, Charla Nash, is in critical condition.

And here are some more chimp attacks, plus, there are 58 more YouTube videos with similiar attacks,prompting the question, can violent chimps be trusted? The answer is probably not, & why should they be? Why, just in the space of less than 2 paragraphs, we've seen a veritable plethora of such attacks. Now, the guy in the video obviously did the right thing by going limp but this attack yesterday was something else. Sandra Herold may or may not have given the chimp an adult dose of the human anxiety medication Xanax, which, when when taken properly, can cause moderate to severe partying. However, when given to a 200 lb. chimpanzee, may lead to animal type freak outs such as yesterday's vicious attack. Your results may vary. This was a big pet. Who has a 200 lb. live anything? Most women whose husbands weigh 200 lbs or more are generally terrified of them. She apparently thought that because he'd previously acted in some commercials, he'd be okay. Well, actors are generally A-holes anyway so you have to figure eventually his true colors would come out, which they did, with a vengeance. Opposable thumbs or no, this pet is not some freakin' Cocker Spaniel who might break the skin if he bites you just right, this is an animal that even while domesticated, is not really supposed to be living in captivity, hello, Jane Goodall. Just because she hangs out with chimps & gorillas doesn't mean you should, & Sandra Herold certainly shouldn't have. Imagine being her now, 1st of all, letting a street savvy chimp such as Travis have access to your house keys, 2nd, enlisting your 55 year old friend to try & wrangle him & having to live for the rest of your life with the fact that you got your friend mauled & 3rdly, not stabbing him much sooner & then, having to watch the police put multiple rounds in him. Does this woman not have tranquilizer darts on hand @ all times for just these types of special occasions? It's just as well, Travis probably would've tranked her a long time ago & made his inevitable escape. So, what have we learned? Don't have pets who are stronger than you & if you do, you sure as Hell don't want to give them Xanax.

Now, for the matter of Nadya Suleman, the mother of the famous octuplets & the chick everyone's obsessed with because she & Angelina Jolie both have lips. This is such big news that I don't feel remotely qualified to talk about it, but here goes anyway... The thing that really grinds my gears is how now she wants government assistance to pay for her now 14 kids. 14 kids by In Vitro. Hello, a little financial planning might've been in order, especially when you already have 6 & you find out there's going to be 8, count 'em 8 more! I realize you love them all, but you could probably AngelinaJolieBay 1 or 2 of them & still have way too many freakin' kids!!!. That is all.

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